Handling Difficult Guests in Hospitality

Here’s something that should be obvious: People don’t like to have their grievances downplayed or dismissed. When that happens, even the smallest irritations can turn into an obsessive crusade. Imagine you’re staying at a hotel, and the air conditioning isn’t working right. You call the front desk to mention it, and they say, oh yeah, they know about that, and someone is going to come fix that next week (after you’ve left). In the meantime, could you just open a window (down to that noisy, busy street)? Not a word of apology, no tone of contrition. Now what was a mild annoyance – that it’s 74F degrees when you like to sleep at 69F – is suddenly the end of the world! You swell with righteous fury, swear you’ll write a letter to management, and savage the hotel in your online review. Jean-Louis Gassée, who used to run Apple France, describes this situation as the choice of the two tokens. When you deal with people who have trouble, you can either choose to taken the token that says “it’s no big deal” or the token that says “it’s the end of the world”. Whichever token you pick, they’ll take the other. The hotel staff in the example above clearly took the “it’s no big deal” token, and as a result forced you to take the “it’s the end of the world” token. But they could just as well have made the opposite choice. Imagine the staff answering something like this: "We’re so sorry. That’s clearly unacceptable! I completely understand how it must be almost impossible to sleep when it’s so hot in your room. If I can’t fix this problem for you tonight, would you like me to refund your stay and help you find a different hotel room nearby? In any case, while we’re figuring out the solution, allow me to send up a bottle of ice water and some ice cream. We’re terribly sorry for this ordeal and we’ll do everything to make it right." With an answer like that, you're almost forced to pick the "It's no big deal" token. Yeah, sure, some water and ice cream would be great! Everyone wants to be heard and respected. It usually doesn’t cost much to do either. And it doesn’t really matter all that much whether you ultimately think you’re right and they’re wrong. Arguing with heated feelings will just increase the burn. Keep that in mind the next time you take a token. Which one are you leaving for the customer? —— This essay was republished from our book "It Doesn't Have to Be Crazy at Work". https://lnkd.in/emPCjAA

You can't avoid difficult people, But you CAN learn to handle them: Some people test your patience. Others test your professionalism. These 16 do's and don'ts will let you stay calm, clear, and in control - Without losing yourself in the process: 1. When they're being aggressive ↳Do: Hold firm and say, "I'm willing to talk when this is respectful" ↳Don't: Escalate or tolerate abuse 2. When someone interrupts you ↳Do: Say, "Let me finish my thought - then I want to hear your take" ↳Don't: Talk over them or shut down 3. When it gets personal ↳Do: Say, "Let's stay focused on the problem, not personal stuff" ↳Don't: Take the bait or retaliate 4. When criticism feels harsh ↳Do: Look for the useful piece or the best possible interpretation ↳Don't: Get defensive or shut down 5. When they won't listen ↳Do: Ask questions and seek understanding ↳Don't: Lecture or steamroll 6. When they push a bad idea ↳Do: Ask, "What's the best next step we can agree on?" ↳Don't: Keep arguing just to win 7. When it's going in circles ↳Do: Say, "Let's pause and revisit when we're ready" ↳Don't: Keep pushing through unproductive tension 8. When they disagree strongly ↳Do: Acknowledge their view and find common ground ↳Don't: Try to force instant agreement 9. When you need to set a boundary ↳Do: Be clear, direct, and respectful ↳Don't: Hint, avoid, or explode 10. When they're thinking illogically ↳Do: Ask, "What evidence supports that?" ↳Don't: Let emotion override reason 11. When you're triggered ↳Do: Take a breath and pause before you speak ↳Don't: Let it leak into your tone or words 12. When someone avoids the issue ↳Do: Raise it directly but gently ↳Don't: Hope it just goes away 13. When there's tension but no talk ↳Do: Invite a calm, open conversation ↳Don't: Ignore the elephant in the room 14. When feedback is needed ↳Do: Be honest and specific, not personal ↳Don't: Sugarcoat or criticize vaguely 15. When your values are crossed ↳Do: Stand firm with grace ↳Don't: Compromise your integrity to avoid conflict 16. When there's resistance ↳Do: Ask, "What concerns are holding us back?" ↳Don't: Bulldoze or dismiss hesitation You don't have to match their energy. You just have to manage your own. Any other tips you'd add? --- ♻️ Repost to help someone in your network who needs this right now. And follow me George Stern for more professional growth content.

Quickly defuse upset customers with the Partner Technique. I learned this while watching airline gate agents. Some passengers try to board with oversized bags. It's the gate agent's job to prevent the passenger from boarding the plane with a bag that's too large to fit in the overhead bin. 😡 This conversation can feel confrontational. Passengers can get upset when they're about to board the plane and the gate agent pulls them aside to test the size of their bag in the baggage sizer that's next to the boarding gate. The Partner Technique prevents that anger. It works by convincing the customer you are on their side and want them to succeed. Here's a break-down: 1. Body language ❌ Don't stand face-to-face ✅ Stand next to the customer and face the issue together The gate agent walked around the counter and stood at the passenger's side. Standing next to a customer allows you to look at the situation together. 2. Partnership invitation ❌ Don't issue commands ("You'll have to...") ✅ Make a partnership invitation ("Let's...") The gate agent invited the passenger to help solve the issue by measuring the bag together. "Let's measure your bag and make sure it will fit in the overhead bin on the plane." 3. Reassurance ❌ Don't ignore simmering emotions ✅ Reassure the customer that you are on their side Some passengers were anxious about losing their place in the boarding line. The gate agent included a reassuring statement for those passengers. "You can right to the front of the line as soon as we're finished with your bag." The Partner Technique can work wonders. It's hard to be upset at someone who is on your side! ✍️ Where can you use the Partner Technique to prevent or defuse customer anger?

Ever feel like you're facing a storm when dealing with angry customers? 🌪️ I've got a powerful technique that'll help you calm the waters and turn those heated interactions into productive conversations! Let's talk about the "Communication Chain" - a three-step approach rooted in brain science that can transform how you handle upset customers. Here's why it works: -It taps into the brain's natural processes 🧠 -Shifts customers from emotional to rational thinking -Builds connection and trust 🤝 Ready to master the Communication Chain? Here's how: 1. Active Listening 👂 2. Let the customer vent without interruption 3. Use verbal cues like "I understand" and "I hear you" 4. Validation Statements 💬 5. Acknowledge their feelings (e.g., "I understand why you're feeling frustrated"). This shows empathy without necessarily agreeing 6. Closed-Ended Questions ❓Ask three questions they're likely to answer "yes" to. Example: "The issue started when [summarize problem], correct?" 7. This subtly shifts brain activity to rational thinking. Why is this so effective? When customers are angry, their limbic system (emotional center) takes over. This technique gently guides them back to their prefrontal cortex (rational thinking area). Remember, the goal isn't to dismiss their feelings - it's to acknowledge them and then guide the conversation towards solutions. Next time you're faced with an upset customer, give the Communication Chain a try. You might be surprised at how quickly it can transform a tense situation into a constructive dialogue! What's your go-to method for handling angry customers? Share your experiences below! 👇

The Secret to Better Hotel Review Responses Do you respond to hotel reviews based on the issue… or the emotion behind it? Many hotels focus on fixing the problem a guest mentions in a review. And while that’s important, it’s only half the equation. Guests aren’t just looking for solutions—they’re looking to feel heard, understood, and valued. Imagine responding to a review that says: “The room was dirty, and no one came to fix it. I’ll never stay here again.” A standard response might be: “We apologize for the issue and will work to improve our housekeeping.” ✅ But a great response also acknowledges the emotion: “We’re truly sorry for your experience. We understand how frustrating that must have been, and we’ve addressed this with our team to ensure it doesn’t happen again. We’d love the chance to make things right.” 💡 See the difference? Addressing both the issue and the emotion builds trust and loyalty and even turns a frustrated guest into a returning one. I break this down in my latest video—watch it now to learn how to elevate your hotel’s reputation, one response at a time. 🎥👇 #Repond&Resolve #TMG #Hospitality #GuestExperience #HotelManagement #OnlineReputation #CustomerService #ReputationManagement #TravelMediaGroup

Don’t avoid the hard conversation. Use these 8 steps instead: Like many people, I used to avoid hard conversations until it was too late. When the stakes and emotions are high, and opinions differ, silence breaks trust. Tension builds. Trust erodes. Opportunities are lost. I learned this time and again. What if you could handle these moments with clarity and kindness? Use these 8 steps to navigate difficult conversations: 1. Ask to Understand: - Help me understand your perspective. - Can you walk me through your thinking? 2. State Only the Facts: - Here’s what I’ve observed [..]. - What’s your take on this situation? 3. Focus on Shared Goals - We both want [shared goal]. Let’s figure this out together. - How can we ensure the best outcome for everyone? 4. Stay Calm Under Pressure - I can see this is important to you. Let’s talk it through. - I’m committed to finding a solution with you. 5. Acknowledge Their Perspective - I hear what you’re saying. - It sounds like [paraphrase their perspective]. Is that right? 6. Address Misunderstandings - Can we clarify what you meant by [..]? - What do you think I might not be seeing? 7. Find a Path Forward - What’s the best way for us to move forward? - Here’s what I propose. What are your thoughts? 8. Recap & Align - We've agreed on [..]. Anything else to consider? - Let's check back in [specific timeframe]. Difficult conversations aren’t the problem. It’s how we show up for them that makes the difference. With the right approach, you can turn high-stakes moments into shared understanding. ➕ Follow me, Melody Olson, for Leadership, Tech & Career Insights. ♻️ Repost to help your network navigate difficult conversations with trust.

Conflict happens. Harsh words are said. 6 better ways to lead when emotions run high. ”YOU crossed the line!” ”NO! YOU crossed the line!” Everyone’s reacting, upset, and feels justified. But then you let it slide to “keep it professional.” It ends up being unresolved. Then it turns into hesitation, silence & delay. But someone has to lead, so why not make that someone you. Here are 6 Ways to Manage Conflict and Stay Human When Emotions Run High: 1️⃣Listen without defending ↳ 𝘏𝘰𝘸: Let them speak fully, no interruptions.  ↳ 𝘞𝘩𝘺 𝘪𝘵 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘬𝘴: It lowers defensiveness and shows respect. ✅ “Tell me more about how that landed for you.” 2️⃣Communicate Clearly, Not Critically ↳ How: Focus on what happened not who caused it. ↳ Why it works: It keeps the conversation solution-focused. ✅ “Here’s what I noticed, and how it impacted our work.” 3️⃣Go Deeper Than the Surface Conflict ↳ How: Ask what outcome they were aiming for.  ↳ Why it works: Often, it’s not personal, it’s misaligned priorities. ✅ “What is the bigger goal or concern I might’ve missed?” 4️⃣Collaborate Toward the Fix  ↳ How: Invite them to define the next step with you.  ↳Why it works: It builds shared ownership, not resistance. ✅ “What could we both do differently next time?” 5️⃣Keep Your Emotions in Check ↳ How: Slow down your tone and breathing. Count to 5. ↳ Why it works: Calm regulates the whole conversation. ✅ Remind yourself: This is repair, not retaliation. 6️⃣Follow Up. Don’t Just Move On ↳ How: Revisit the conversation a few days later.  ↳ Why it works: It proves the resolution wasn’t performative. ✅ “How are you feeling about how we left the conversation?” You don’t need authority to take the lead. Just courage and care. What strategies have helped you resolve conflict without losing your cool? ————————— ♻️ Repost to help others navigate conflict with empathy. 🔔 Follow Justin Hills for practical leadership insights.

Today the hotel lost two days of my human milk that I had pumped and asked them to freeze for me. I had an early departure so I even called last night to make sure I understood the best process to set myself and them up for success. They assured me that I just had to call 20m ahead of departure and they’d have it ready for me. But I guess something got lost in translation, because this morning nothing was to be found. Beyond that, while I was waiting for them to find it my Lyft that I’d scheduled the night before got snagged by someone else. This could have had huge positive impacts on my relationship with the Hilton brand had anyone expressed any kind of understanding of the situation. That milk symbolizes NINE HOURS of pumping over the span of two days and could literally sustain a human baby for the same time. But from the perspective of the desk staff, it was basically a lost sock. “Yeah, I’m not finding it anywhere. Here’s my manager’s card” is a fine response, I guess, in that it tells me what I need to know. However a few extra sentences could have made me a lifetime Hilton fan, versus someone who was standing on the curb waiting for a new Lyft weeping. Here’s what those extra sentences would have looked like: “Hey, I’m so sorry, but it looks like we have misplaced your milk. I can’t find it.” <- Acknowledging the situation. “I’ve never chest fed, but I hear it’s a lot of work. I imagine you must feel really upset right now.” <- Aligning with the customer. “I don’t have a solution right now, but as soon as my manager gets in I’m going to talk to them about how this happened. It seems like we need to put better processes in place to make sure we aren’t losing precious stuff like this. I’ll have her call you this afternoon, but here’s her card if you want to reach out.” <- Assuring the customer that you’ll try to make it right. Acknowledge. Align. Assure. Let the person who you’ve borked know that you know you’ve borked them and that you want to learn from the mistake and they are likely to understand from a human level. But if you don’t treat THEM from a human level, don’t expect anything in return. Do this in emails. Do this over the phone. Do this to your friends. Your kids. Your partner. It’s just being human and treating others with humanity and it’s not rocket science and makes everything so much better and also has the bonus side effect that it boosts CLTV.

I'm usually pretty successful at turning guest complaints around or making them work to my advantage. Here's what I do: 1) Match or exceed the guest's level of concern. Don't downplay. Be as concerned or more concerned than the guest appears, even if the issue is easily solved. 70% of the time, the guest will either feel seen, or they will start to downplay their own issue. 2) If it's not an emergency, don't offer a solution first. Instead, ask a clarifying question. This regularly stops me from over-solving an issue with excess money or time. This also puts the ball in the court of less responsive guests, who then have to decide if the problem is worth the conversation. 3) Be very grateful that the guest is keeping an eye on the property. I often provide context, like saying "Our guests almost never tell us when something is wrong. Thanks for respecting the place and treating it like your own home!" Guests will often feel a sense of responsibility for a home they have been praised for protecting. So a conversation might go like this: Guest: "You don't have enough towels." You: "Oh no! I'm so sorry about that. Let's get this fixed for you. Did you guys already get the towels from the linen closet?" Guest: "Didn't realize there was a linen closet. We're fine." OR Guest: "Your refrigerator is dirty." You: "Thank you so much for telling me! That's not acceptable. We maintain a high cleanliness standard, so hopefully this was an one-time incident. Would you kindly send a photo of the issue? Are there any other problem areas? Let me know if you'd like to have us come by to clean it now." Guest: "We already took care of it. No other issues. Place is great!" You: "We're so glad you like it! Thank you for actually looking out for these issues and treating this place like your own. We know you'll be a good guest!"

The conversation framework that transformed our client relationships: (Even when delivering difficult news) Difficult conversations, delivered skillfully, build more trust than years of smooth sailing. The key is having a system. My three-part framework that transforms challenging conversations... 1. Preparation creates confidence Never enter difficult conversations blind. Gather complete information beyond the bad news. Include context, alternatives, and solutions. Build explanation frameworks before you need them. When clients ask hard questions, have real answers ready. 2. Structure enhances clarity How you deliver matters as much as what you deliver. Start with context and purpose - why this conversation matters now. Present information directly. No corporate speak, no hedging. Acknowledge the impact and emotions involved. Then pivot to next steps and support. Clarity beats comfort every time. 3. Follow-through builds trust Document outcomes immediately. Deliver on every commitment made during the conversation. Check in regularly... they'll tell you if it's too much. Provide ongoing support without being asked. The conversation isn't over when the call ends. Clients don't remember the easy conversations. They remember how you handled the hard ones. - Want boardroom intelligence with zero noise? Every week we share curated insights that cut through the chaos and help you make the best policy decisions: Join here: https://lnkd.in/garzxSxG LION Specialty. The Leader in Institutional Insurance. 🦁